"There are two types of people who will tell you that you cannot make a difference in this world: those who are afraid to try and those who are afraid you will succeed."
Do you have those moments when you actually felt good during the day, but then a message from someone comes in and it changes your mood? Do you know these moments when someone had said something to you and regardless of what you do, it stays in your mind? Do you feel that sometimes you take things too personally too quickly, and the "disadvantage" of being compassionate is being sensitive towards other people`s energies?
If yes, then let me share with you 3 tips how to deal with other people`s, esp. negative energies, how to not let this bring you down, and how you shield your energy without shutting down:
1. People`s energies, feedback, reactions always tell them about themselves than about you
Even though people direct their energy, words, and actions towards you, this always tells you more about them than about you. If a person is reacting negatively towards you, the negative energy is because of them because they are the ones who exude this. If a person is giving feedback about you, it still shows how they see you in their world of things. If a person is attacking or hurting you, then it also shows that they are in such a negative or fearful state, that they, unfortunately, are currently in.
Of course, we are responsible for our actions, so if we had - consciously or unconsciously - trigger someone, then it is also our responbility to learn how to deal with the consequences, but it is not our responsibility and in our power to control how others react to you. Reminding yourself of this is the first step to get detached and distance yourself from others. Imagine someone who is really negative - we can be compassionate with their negative energies, maybe this person is surrounded by negative people all day long, working in a toxic environment, and maybe even having overwhelming family responsibilities. Maybe if we were in their place, we would react the same - while this also doesn`t excuse, more explain their behavior, by knowing that this has more likely to do with themselves than yourself, you can focus on your wellbeing.
2. Be mindful of whose messages you would like to let into your world
To prevent others` messages can change your day to the bad, be mindful of whose messages you allow to have your attention. I had to learn the hard way that even though I myself write mindfully and choose my words carefully, it doesn`t mean that my counterpart has the same intention. In our own world, we often live our truth and take this as everyone else`s - but both unfortunately and gladly, we all have a free will to decide and behave as we wish.
So the only thing you can take charge of is to decide whose messages you consume and when - is it right in the morning when starting your day or the last thing before you enter the world of dreams? Is it before an important client meeting or when you have to concentrate? I know that sometimes we seem to have the automatic habit to check our phone and open this message, as soon as there is a "ping", but good news is that we can re-wire our brain and re-train our muscle, and see all these attractions as an invitation to practice in a mental gym. Don`t forget - your time and attention is your currency!
3. How can you love, nourish, and take care of yourself?
Protecting ourselves from other people, who are in a negative state of mind, naturally raises the question how we can avoid being in a drained energy ourselves. How can we nourish ourselves such that our tank is full and we feel literally so loved that nothing can really shake us? Imagine a blissful child with an exhausted parent, who comes home and without wanting, releases a judgmental comment - if the child is receptive, it would cry and form a limiting belief. If the child feels loved, it would remain unshaken and even ask back, "What do you have, mom?", which can bring down our wall and make us want embrace our little child.
How can you strengthen your positive aura, so it protects you from others` wild energies, while still staying open as you are? What makes you happy? What is it that you need? Which thoughts and habits are useful and which are not so helpful? At the end, also don`t forget that it is not your fault that this person has a negative mind, so also not your burden to carry. Don`t let others bring you down - instead, try to lift yourself up and by this, others may either go away because your positivity is too bright or learn how they can move out of their own darkness.
Love, from me to you,
Would you like to go deeper in a free Coaching session? Let me know by sending an email to email@example.com – I very look forward to hearing from you! :) PS: Subscribe to my #mindfulmagic Newsletter to stay in touch for upcoming posts, free offers, and news :)
Inspiration: Dragonfruit Collective
Reflection: What helps me to stay uplifted?
Intention: I focus on my energy to uplift me - my energy is mine, others` energies are theirs.
Viet Linh Le is a female visionary, qualified coach with corporate experience, and multi-cultural founder of @vietnamwellbeing, with the mission to change our world by coaching the next-generation decision-makers. Find out more on www.vietlinhle.com